“My heroes have always been cowboys, and they still are, it seems...”, the old country song laments.
Which is true for me, to a degree, because I have always had great respect for the ‘cowboy code’, and growing up in the high desert of West Texas with saddles and six-guns (really!) certainly helped. There have been athletes, intellectuals, and a few others as well whose characteristics and attributes I admired and even emulated, but I never thought of them as ‘heroes’, if you know what I mean.
The real heroes in my life are those people whose investment in my life, intentional or otherwise, changed who I was and molded me into who I am today. These are the people that I consider myself obligated to simply because I like who I have become as a result of their attention and tutelage.
The list is a short one. My father, Ed, living in Virginia now, is the first on my list, and taught me right from wrong, to think for myself, when to be comforting and approachable, and when to be hard as hull-metal. My grandfather, Fred, lived a standard for godliness and civility that I will spend the rest of my life trying to emulate. My teacher from eighth grade through my senior year, David Archer, who taught me how to play chess, how to learn, and most importantly, gave me a love for learning. These three men considered themselves responsible for me at various times during my formative years, and I see their influence in my life every day.
There is one more on my list of heroes, and I told him so recently when I had the chance to spend a few days with him at his home in the Florida pan-handle. Many of you know him as I did, as “Captain”, or CDR Leon Uplinger.
Cap’n Uplinger taught me a great deal about life, leadership, responsibility, and command, in countless lessons learned not in the classroom, but in the school of real world submarine operations. I suspect that many of those lessons weren’t even intentional, but being on the receiving end of the O-5/E-6 relationship provided unlimited opportunity for learning!
Those lessons learned have been used daily in my professional and personal life.
Problem in the plant? Four questions: what’s wrong, how does it restrict operations, how long will it take until we are unrestricted, and what do you need from me. When something went south on the boat, I knew that if I was ready to answer those four questions when the Cap’n showed up on scene, I was half-way to successful resolution. I have demanded that same practice from my direct reports my entire career.
Pulling into port for a week or two. Do your stores load Day One. You never know when the situation will change and require you to shove off early. Without stores. Because you were lazy or not thinking ahead. Best demonstrated by author Patrick O’Brian’s Aubrey-Maturin novels, in the commonly heard commands of ‘Lucky Jack’ Aubrey, English naval captain, always followed by the phrase “not a moment to lose!” Anticipating the unexpected, and being prepared, a valuable combination.
Getting underway. On time, every time. Even if you have to row it away from the pier. We joked about that a lot, but making and keeping promises is a powerful tool, and one that not many people are good at. Keeping promises puts you way ahead of the crowd.
Just three of the many lessons I credit to Cap’n Uplinger, and I had thought many times about making the trip to tell him so in person. But thirty years was a long time, and who knows if he’d even remember me? I was more than a little apprehensive when I finally decided to make it happen.
I contacted Leon when I found I would be in Florida on business, and asked if he would be open to a visit from a shipmate who served with him back on the Bates. Talk about the unexpected response! The two-hour lunch I had envisioned turned into a three day visit, with Leon and his wife Ann opening their home and lives to a relative stranger, or so I thought, from over three decades ago.
It was as if we’d been roommates back then. Greeted with welcoming hugs at the door, we spent hours reminiscing and stayed up until early morning swapping stories and catching up. Ann kept us going with meals, coffee, a little wine, and her gentle good humor, making me feel like family. The days flew by.
When I finally left that Saturday to catch my flight back to Michigan, I realized that I had experienced something truly special, and I will treasure those few short days we spent together. Thanks, Leon and Ann, I am touched by your hospitality!
Another lesson. Don’t miss the chance to thank your hero, and don’t be surprised when you find he appreciates it as much as you do!
And...there’s not a moment to lose.
My father, my grandfather, my high school teacher, my Captain.
My heroes.
To merely say thank you will never be sufficient.
I trust my life lived out reflects the integrity and honor they taught, and will be found worthy of those I call...my heroes.
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